My dark days

After daddy passed away, I tried to kill myself once.
On the road.
Thinking of creating an accident.
I did not die.
Death is very painful.
I don't want my mum to go through it again.

I lost faith and interest in life.
I hope the time could go faster.
I can get older.
And die.

In these few months, I had been taking sleeping pills and anti-depressant pills.
My body was getting  weaker.
I asked myself everyday in the morning.
"Why am I still here?"
"I should have died long ago."
I cried days and countless nights.

Until one day, I checked my mailbox and deleting some of the junk mails.
I saw what my daddy sent me on my last birthday.
Then, I realized that he always wants me to live a better life.

Now, I am picking up all the broken pieces of mine and start to love people around me.
I will leave this world one day.
Before this happens, I want to live my life to its fullness.

Yes, I am also on my way to search my faith in God.
I just need some time.

我的身子

最近身子变差了，在想，我到底还能拖着这种身子活几久。
之后，我开始注意饮食
开始做运动
开始观察身体的变化

然后发现，我好像从来没有跟自己的身体好好沟通过
以为自己很耐操
以为自己很年轻
手指算一算，我也一把年纪了
是时候养生了

听起来好像有这么一回事一样（窃笑××）

我要催眠自己
要持之以恒
一定要运动
一定要健健康康的

我一定还有什么任务·还未完成所以还活着
为了找到那个任务
我必须要健康！！！！

Money is the source of evil??

If you hate rich and successful people, it just means that YOU are very very poor right now.
Don't hate them, learn from them.

乐观永远都在

新的一年，我将要把悲观拿走，然后将阳光引进。
过去，我并没有完全接受上帝给我安排的人生，
因为我骨子里一直向往着高级的人生。
现实生活非常血淋淋，并没有什么高级可言。
表面上好像接受了，但是心里非常不爽。

可能是荷尔蒙的关系，又或者是书里得到的启示
我开始欣赏我拥有的东西
细细点算之后，还会感到脚软，想马上下跪感谢神的恩赐。

在嘲笑全世界关于世界末日愚蠢想法 的同时，
我觉得这个愚昧的日子是值得纪念的，
因为你我从此重生了。

如果你不小心经过我的部落格，
祝福你每一天都过得充实，为自己，也为别人。

最浪漫的语言

很多人都说法文最浪漫。
听了N次都没有感觉。

我觉得最浪漫的语言就是自己的母语。
只有最贴近自己灵魂的语言才能表达最完整的爱。

当爱 透过空气，顺利地传达给对方，
那就是最浪漫的语言。

 “时光静好，与君语;
细水流年，与君同;
繁华落尽，与君老。”

P/S：法文比中文浪漫？？连门都没有～～～

只是感动了自己

一直很努力生活
一直在等待一个奇迹
花光了所有的运气和时间
发现
最后只是感动了自己。

A sad person

Sometimes, I would go to the market or shopping mall, and standing in the crowd, listening to the people, just to make sure I am still alive. Did you have a same experience like this? Or I am the only sad person in this world?