After daddy passed away, I tried to kill myself once.
On the road.
Thinking of creating an accident.
I did not die.
Death is very painful.
I don't want my mum to go through it again.
I lost faith and interest in life.
I hope the time could go faster.
I can get older.
And die.
In these few months, I had been taking sleeping pills and anti-depressant pills.
My body was getting weaker.
I asked myself everyday in the morning.
"Why am I still here?"
"I should have died long ago."
I cried days and countless nights.
Until one day, I checked my mailbox and deleting some of the junk mails.
I saw what my daddy sent me on my last birthday.
Then, I realized that he always wants me to live a better life.
Now, I am picking up all the broken pieces of mine and start to love people around me.
I will leave this world one day.
Before this happens, I want to live my life to its fullness.
Yes, I am also on my way to search my faith in God.
I just need some time.
