癞蛤蟆想吃天鹅肉

知道什么是癞蛤蟆想吃天鹅肉吗？

基本上就是说，一个条件极差的人想得到一些美好的事，然而当事人并没有察觉自己是没有资格得到天鹅的。

当然，每一个人都觉得自己是天鹅，每一个人都觉得自己应该拥有更好的。

除了自己，其他人都是癞蛤蟆。

我称这些人为 ‘自以为是天鹅症候群’。

我以前也是有这种病，现在医好了。

我也曾是一只自视过高的天鹅，觉得其他人都是癞蛤蟆。

殊不知，我也是一只癞蛤蟆，还是一只把嘴巴张得很大的癞蛤蟆。 

自从病好后，我就是一只癞蛤蟆。

我要用癞蛤蟆的眼睛去看这个世界。

我唯一跟其他癞蛤蟆的分别就是。。。。。我是一只自视过高的癞蛤蟆，不是任何天鹅肉我都放进嘴里的。

《天使爱美丽》

有谁不曾为那暗恋而痛苦？我们总以为那份痴情很重，很重，是世上最重的重量。有一天，暮然回首，我们才发现，它一直都是很轻，很轻的。我们以为爱的很深，很深，来日岁月，会让你知道，它不过很浅，很浅。最深和最重的爱，必须和时日一起成长。——《天使爱美丽》
Is there anyone who hasn't suffered for the secret love? We always think that love is very heavy, heavy and could be the heaviest thing in the world. But one day, when you look back, you suddenly realize that it's always light, light. We all thought love was very deep, but in fact it's very thin. The deepest and heaviest love must grow up with the time. ---- < Amelie >

Finished an interview

Phew....just finished the most important interview KPLI but the results will be released after a month. 
Basically, I think I was doing good. When they asked me questions, I answered them calmly. When they wanted me to write an article, I crapped reasonably. When we were having group discussion, I gave educated point of views.

If I got this, I am going to pursue my Master before my brain is dead. Actually, I don't need to trouble myself by studying that much but it is necessary to get this Master cert to build my self-esteem wall. You say I am silly...yes, you are right.....I am the dumbest person on earth who is going to get the Master toilet paper and stuck it into those  mouths who are looking down on me.


 Ok, I am done here. I will keep other negative stuff to myself.

P/S: Wow, now u can leave me a comment here, excited huh~

很闲~

如果世界没有天空，我要对着什么发呆？

最后一天

今天是我在学校最后一天上课，我的心情并没有我想象中兴奋和愉快，也没有觉得不舍，只是觉得完成了一项任务。
无可否认的，我也学习了蛮多的，无论是从其他老师或学生身上。
我终于熬过了，我觉得我还蛮厉害的。请神赋于我力量，因为我又要踏出下一步了。

香格里拉

香格里拉是1933年英国著名小说家 詹姆斯. 希尔顿 在小说《消失的地平线》中所描绘的一个永恒，和平，宁静的地方。
那里，一片绝尘静域，神奇得让人一见倾心。
顾名思义就是人间天堂咯。
有人说希尔顿笔下的香格里拉在喜玛拉雅山的山脚；也有人说是中国的西藏。
两者我都没到过，所以没办法体会当中的美好。
但是，我相信地球上总有一些未被人类摧毁的净土。

我也想找到一个让我心旷神怡的人间天堂，我想应该很容易找到吧~本人对于美好的事物并没有设下很高的要求。
等我攒够了银两，我就去寻找属于我的香格里拉~>.<

请给我一点点。。。

我又在倒数了，倒数什么时候这一切会结束。原来工作真的会让一个人疯掉，尤其是你不喜欢这份工作。我尽量不要埋怨，不要投诉，把自己的感觉往口里塞，然后用万能胶封上来。
把自己困在自己的牢里其实很寂寞的，又不能跟别人分享，感觉就好像踩到牛屎一样。。。无言~
那么，在自己的部落格叹气一下总可以吧~

每次逃到没有后路的时候，还好可以回到这里，这里好安全，好安静，只有少数人会来关心我的部落格，会读中文的朋友更少，所以这里是我最好的避风港。

我是一个可怜虫
可怜虫需要一点勇气
只要一点勇气就够了
真的一点就够了~

P/S：我很想发出正面能量，但是没办法，最近很负面~

活过来了~

从吉隆坡回来已有几天了，感觉又回来了，可能是看了三部戏的关系吧！

连我妹妹看见我都说，我好想活过来了，之前好像一个死人一样。

哈哈~可能是吧！还好有美玉陪我说说话，有些东西我终于想通了，我会好好地规划我的未来的，你们不用担心。


我一直在想，身边的人总是想看我什么时候跌倒，什么时候失败，然后出现嘲笑我。但是我错了，真心朋友是不会的，因为他们看见我幸福，他们也会为我感到高兴。

P/S：有了新的爱好，就是收集故事~

One afternoon

I had donated some of my clothes to an organization this afternoon. Like my grandmother said, we never offer anything to anybody in the world but we took an awful lot. So, it is about time to give back some. 
After work, I have ample time to sort out all my old clothes and I found something interesting in my closet. My mum said, I should give out some nice and decent clothes to those children but not those frumpy clothes, so, I was having a tough time to decide which one is decent and which one is 'frumpy' .
Hahaha....talking about the interesting stuff in my closet....I found some clothes that I used to wear when I was in Form 5. Those are really ugly, old fashioned and frayed jeans.....and also some T-shirts which have already gone out of style....urggghhhh......why I didn't take care of my appearance in those golden age, no wonder nobody courted me that time....haiz
Moving on, if you still remember, Yik Hong designed a T-shirt for English Math Science society.....it is my favourite all the time. But it has become yellowish and unwearable now. Anyone is still keeping that shirt?? We have a lot of good memories there.
Besides that, my Temenggung and Jaguar T-shirts....it reminded me that we were always the loser in the sport days. Aisskkk....How much I wish we could get the champion for just one year. We lost the championship for 4 years continuously. Sad. Better delete this awful memory by throwing the T-shirts. 
 And you know, I have many jackets and sweaters. I donated half of them so I can get some new one....Hehe...still have evil intention in my good deed. I also helped my sister to give out some T-shirts, everybody knows she is a shopaholic. >.<
Good news......I also can get some news jeans now because I lost weight, I think 3kg. I have been jogging for some time, it is time to see the result of my effort. Bulge, please go away, I don't need you in my life...haha
With the sun streaming into my room, I was having a good time with all my clothes.

P/S: My mood is green colour today.

Let me decide~

I was sending resume out today. I hope I will get some good news soon. Erm.....I don't care anymore, just hand everything to God, and see what happen ahead.
People are giving advices to me all these days. I am sick of it already. I want to decide on my own, so please don't force me to accept any of those experience talks already. Because if I never try, I will never know. If you say I will regret in the future, then let me regret.  
Maybe regrets gives my life curves but not horizontal lines.

25 Little Things That You Don't Need To Know About Me~

After I read Liu Xuan's book, I decided to have my own list too----25 little things that you don't need to know about me. Just like Liu Xuan said, the least important things actually are those important details that we used to miss it. I cracked my brain and came out with this list. Enjoy it but don't feel bored because they are really unimportant.

1. I like when my friends call me Xian. It sounds like we are family more than friends. My uncles and aunties like to call me Xian Xian. I always complain about this because I don’t want them to treat me like a kid. However, I still feel warm every time I hear them call me Xian Xian. 
2. I keep all the letters and cards that my friends sent me. I keep them well in a box. I will take it out to refresh my memory when I feel bored. Therefore, sometimes my mum worries when I smile or laugh alone in my room.
3. Talking about letters, I think the most romantic job in this world is postman. Postmen are just like angels because they have changed people’s life indirectly. But after all the emails, messages, facebook and msn, postmen are not very important in most of the societies. It is sad because the new generation is not going to have chance to feel the warmth of the letters.
4. I think I am rather smart because when I read, I totally understand what the writers are trying to say. And my friends always need me to re-explain the content of a book every time we read. But there is one book that I really don’t quite get it. The book is bible. I feel stupid when I read bible. Even I have pastors and friends to explain to me when I am in a total confusion. I talked to my Father personally but as usual He didn’t answer. So, just pretend I understand and take all the official explanations.
5. My friends said women need to know how to tackle alcohol. She asked me to try and learn how to drink alcohol. I know we need to know how to drink or ‘sip’ alcohol when we socialize in the future. But my body cannot take any foods or liquids which is BITTER. If alcohol tastes like Rebena, maybe I will shout: “Come! A glass of gin and tonic!”
6. I bought a sketch book last year and hope to draw something when I am free. Until now, my sketch book is still very clean and stays smartly on the shelf. I think it is time to buy some crayons. Haha~
7. My sister bought an English book for O Level. The title of the book is ‘Mastering Tough Vocabulary’. I laughed at my sister and started flipping over the book. Eventually, I spent the whole evening reading the book. Those vocabs are truly TOUGH. It was very challenging, I like it.^^
8. I am really scared of cold.

My father is happy because he does not need to buy me an air-con.

Sweaters and jackets are always in my shopping list.

If I forget to bring sweater to cinema, I will curse myself.

My friends say I am insane because I have two blankets on my bed.

Thank God, I am living in Malaysia.

9. Every time before I go out, I will remind myself to bring recycle bag. I am not a politician who can help or improve the environment, but at least I reduce the chances of creating so many burdens to the earth.
10. When I was in secondary school, I subscribed a monthly high school magazine called “Zhong Xue Sheng”. I like it so much and I keep all of them in a special box (actually I have many boxes). But last time, when we decided to relocate some of our belongings to our shop, mum threw all my magazines away. I gone crazy and decided to go back to the land field and looked for my magazines. Luckily with my sister’s help, my magazines were saved. Mum, please don’t throw away my memory, they are way too important than my clothes. If you want to throw something, please go to my closet.
11. Talking about my boxes, I also keep my Form Six Chemistry notes in it. My chemistry was not very good but I liked Chemistry class very much. In Mrs Lai’s class, chemistry is no longer just the symbol H2O but it is about life. We can smell, touch and see life through knowing more about chemistry. Since then, I see myself as a person who knows life but not an exam machine. For me, she is not a teacher, she is a scientist.
12. I remember since last time I did not sleep well for few days just to finish my assignments, it caused me a very serious period pain. This seldom happens to me, but I think because of those stressful days, period pain came to knock my door. I went to the pharmacy to buy some painkiller. The pharmacist advised me not to take too much pills because it will cause some side effects. I told him this seldom happened and I promised just to take one. If the pain still continue, I will just let it be. But he still stood there and blah blah blah….

Then I asked him: “xiao di di, do you know what period pain is?”

He kept quiet. Then I continued.

“Period pain is just like thousands of elephants step over my stomach.”

“So, give me the pills.”

He stunned for a while and gave me the pills and kept the money.

I feel sorry for him but he should understand it was not my fault, it was hormone’s fault.

13. I like junk food. But since last time Ceek Chean gave me an “organic food lesson” in the supermarket, I think twice before I buy any junk food.
14. I don’t like to do chores. But once again, after went to Pulau Redang with Ceek Chean, I changed my habit. I clean my room at least two times a week.
15. Ceek Chean is a mean old hag. Blek.^^
16. I brush my teeth before I wash my face. You want me to change the order? NO WAY.
17. My favorite lecturer is Dr. Carmen. I hope I have a sister like her to teach me how to think critically and write academically.
18. My left foot is bigger than my right foot. Therefore, sometimes I just hate wearing heels. It is too excruciating seeing one of my foot staying in the heel which is not its size.
19. I don’t look down on people who look down on me. I look down on those people who look down themselves.
20. If I have extra time and money, I would like to learn sewing and patchwork. Somehow, I think I have the talent.
21. I went back to my high school last week and saw the painting that we drew on the wall when we were in Form Six. I remember Pei San drew that black-green coconut tree……Haha… How good it is if all of us just don’t grow up.
22. A chef looks more charming than a musician. (For me ^^)
23. Although sometimes my uncles, aunties and mum say something bad about my grandfather, I think he is the most caring and thoughtful person in my life. No matter what they say, I respect you grandpa as a hero deep in my heart.
24. My sister told me to have a saving plan from now on and I am actually doing it now. I hope I can buy my own house in the coming future. >< So Excited!!
25. Finally and lastly, this is the least important and you really don’t need to know about it-----I love my family and friends.

Love At First Sight 一见钟情

they're both convinced
that a sudden passion joined them.
such certainty is more beautiful,
but uncertainty is more beautiful still.


since they'd never met before, they're sure
that there'd been nothing between them.
but what's the word from the streets, staircases, hallways--
perhaps they've passed by each other a million times?

i want to ask them
if they don't remember--
a moment face to face
in some revolving door?
perhaps a "sorry" muttered in a crowd?
a curt "wrong number"caught in the receiver?--
but i know the answer.
no, they don't remember.

they'd be amazed to hear
that chance has been toying with them
now for years.

not quite ready yet
to become their destiny,
it pushed them close, drove them apart,
it barred their path,
stifling a laugh,
and then leaped aside.

there were signs and signals,
even if they couldn't read them yet.
perhaps three years ago
or just last tuesday
a certain leaf fluttered
from one shoulder to another?
something was dropped and then picked up.
who knows, maybe the ball that vanished
into childhood's thicket?

there were doorknobs and doorbells
where one touch had covered another
beforehand.
suitcases checked and standing side by side.
one night. perhaps, the same dream,
grown hazy by morning.

every beginning
is only a sequel, after all,
and the book of events
is always open halfway through.

一见钟情

他们彼此深信
是瞬间迸发的热情让他们相遇
这样的确定是美丽的
但变幻无常更为美丽
他们素未谋面
所以他们确定彼此并无任何瓜葛
但是自街道、楼梯、大堂
传来的话语......
他们也许擦肩而过100万次了吧
我想问他们是否记得
在旋转门面对面那一刹
或是在人群中喃喃道出的对不起
或是在电话的另一端道出的打错了
但是我早知道答案
是的
他们并不记得
他们会很讶异
原来缘分已经戏弄他们多年
时机尚未成熟
变成他们的命运
缘分
将他们推进
距离
阻挡他们的去路
忍住笑声
然后闪到一旁

P/S: I read this from my MSN space, still love this poem very much, so I repost it~ Hope u guys like it too~

一场美梦

人际关系越变越复杂，
跟童年的 [不要跟你好]
形成了强烈的对比，
于是我不能不开始怀疑，
小时候与朋友的相爱，
还有热诚相待，
真是一场美梦。

Wish you happy always~

One of my friends walked into marriage last two months. I called to say congratulations.

She told me she was a bit nervous because she did not want to end her single life like this. 

She afraid her boyfriend is not her ultimate Mr. Right. 

However, her boyfriend's parents would like them to marry as quickly as possible.

His parents want to see their grandchildren before they are dead. 

It is kind of weird to hear this. Hello, now is 21st century already, why these old people never give up to force their children producing babies.

Her husband did not know that she had been avoiding conception.

After she married, her husband was so keen to populate the planet as soon as possible. I laughed when I heard this, sorry^^

I did not know how to give comments on this issue, so I tried my best to let her feel that she was exactly at the right position now.

Yesterday, I received a call from her again. She said she is so happy since she married to XX.

I truly can feel her excitement and happiness through her voice. 

I am so glad that she finally got what she wants.

This shows that marriage is not necessary a grave to everyone.

Hahaha, I know somebody is broody now.

Wish you happy happy always.

He is a good guy, don't miss it.~

总要有一个人出来当坏人，那就让我当吧！

你看过一种人吗？
他想尽办法讨好别人
他想所有人都赞同他
他利用他聪明的脑筋和费尽唇舌
说是非和投诉是他的强项
流眼泪更是他的必杀技
演技一流不在话下
是人是鬼，傻傻分不清楚

可能他并没有那么可恶
这些都是我主观的想法

但是我在他身上只是看到这些      而已！！

同情他吧！！他看起来就是如此的可怜！！！！

总要有一个人出来当坏人，那就让我当吧！！

我不想当绵羊

你知道吗？

我快撑不住了，我需要勇气，很大很大的勇气！！！！！！！！！！！
我就快要脑死了，快来救我出深渊吧！！！！！

这几天胸口都是闷闷的，有说不出闷气。
今天下午有轻微地中暑了一下。
看着书，字又进不到脑。
脾气又暴躁，很想找人来骂骂。
又没有心情保养皮肤。
很讨厌啊！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！！

我不知道我要什么，正在找什么。。。为什么人生那么不顺的？？！！
你知道吗？

Do not stand at my grave and weep

If you follow the news on the death of nine tourists in Manila, I think you might have the same feeling as I....heartbroken. People from Hong Kong and China are extremely angry at the way Philippines handling this case. They are stupid and brainless. And their unplanned action resulted the death of the tourists.

The former policeman became a kidnapper and hijacked a bus full of tourists??!! How ridiculous is that!!! Moreover, he was removed by the police in January on charges of extortion and threatening drug dealers. He demanded so he could be reinstated in the police in exchange for the tourists' release.
How on earth this kind of stupid drama could ever happen??!!

Nine passengers have been killed and six injured.
Four broken families.
A husband sacrificed himself in protecting his wife.
Two children lost their parents.

When I become speechless?? Ya, when these things happen, I become speechless.
..............................................................................

All of all, it reminds me a poem.


Do not stand at my grave and weep,



I am not there, I do not sleep.


I am in a thousand winds that blow,


I am the softly falling snow.


I am the gentle showers of rain,


I am the fields of ripening grain.


I am in the morning hush,


I am in the graceful rush


Of beautiful birds in circling flight,


I am the starshine of the night.


I am in the flowers that bloom,


I am in a quiet room.


I am in the birds that sing,


I am in each lovely thing.


Do not stand at my grave and cry,


I am not there. I do not die.
 
 
If I were their friends, I don't know what to say to comfort them, so I dedicate this poem to them.
If I were one of them, I will never laugh again in my life. I will definitely be sent to the mental hospital and live like a living corpse.
I have no ideas how other people can go through this kind of disaster.
Nothing could bring them back together anymore. Even God.
 I hope the people around them will give them strength and help them to become stronger in the coming days.
Just like what the poem said, they do not die and they are living in their heart forever and ever.
 
But still, heartbroken.

Guests in my life

After my graduation, I headed to Seremban to find my cousins. Along the journey, many things flashed over my mind. Mr.Paul lectures, critical thinking classes, Ms. Yoges, assignments, course mates, PC foods, before Jaya One was built, church mates, Jesus Christ, roommates and etc. I was so quiet and sitting there seeing the view outside the train, just like my memory, moving very fast and unreachable.



I hate to say goodbye. Although the relationships among our course mates are not very close but having them in my life just like breathing, you don’t feel it but it is very important.


I know definitely I will keep in touch with some of them like Jane, Ceek Chean, Enyi, Vinu, Kung, Darren and King. But the others….unlikely. When I looked into YZ’s eyes and said ‘Keep In Touch’, I know that would be the last word that I ever said to her. Pity human, pity friendship and pity me. I am trying so hard to catch the bond that holding us together but finally it was broken. Maybe we just need to let some of our ‘guests’ to move on in our life.


Maybe we are not going to meet in the future but anyway I want to say thank you for leaving your footsteps in my heart. Much appreciated.

医生的劝告

今天去了一趟诊所，是为了当临教而去做的身体检查。
平时爸爸总会陪在身边，今天是我一个人去。
我当然会趁着这个机会问医生一些问题啦（爸爸在场我不好意思问）。
我问了关于我家族遗传病的问题。我想知道我可不可以避过这一劫。
医生说：
“你一定要保持体重，因为肥胖很容易引起糖尿病和高血压，尤其是你有这个遗传。”
“从现在培养吃有机食物，养成吃清淡的食物，那么老的时候就不用戒口了。”
“吃少油，少糖，少盐。”
。
。
。
。
。
。
。

“以后选老公的时候就避免有跟你一样遗传病的，以免后代受苦。”

哈哈，医生说着说着就越来越奇怪了，开始他恋爱专家的伟大言论。让我继续。。。

“选老公不用选长得好看的，反正老了大家都一样。”
（如果每一人都像你这样想，整容生意就不会那么发达啦！）

“最好不要迟婚，如果有了糖尿病才怀孕就麻烦了，不能吃药，只能打针。”
（点头点头）

“所以要早一点选男朋友。”
（我的样很像没有男朋友么？？）

“最重要就是人格，疼你就可以啦!”
“不要等缘分到，要自己制造机会，看准一个就出招。”
（哈哈，经典，我要笑翻了，但是还很同意）

“最好就是这两年生啦！”
（笑翻了。。。）
。
。
。
最后，
“选男子最重要就是人格和gene。”
“如果看中了，就骗他去验身。”
（我已经笑死了）

From what he said, I got a very important message which is 'create your own opportunity but not waiting for the destiny'.

Some of my new friends

I have got close to some of my colleagues. One of them is my senior in secondary school. She is fun and talkative. Life in the jungle has been very hard for me because it is kind of boring. With her presence, just like seeing light in the darkness. She is a graduand of Science in UPM (if I am not mistaken) and hope to become a teacher in the future. She worked in Singapore before and really liked the environment there. But her health did not allow her to live in such a hectic city, therefore, she came back and took her father's advice to become a teacher. Well, so far, I found she is good teacher with full of patience and caring...not like me^^

Another teacher was my father's student. My father taught him when he was 13 years old in 1980.....so you can guess his age lah...lol...
He is also a funny character in our school. He is a bachelor and still looking for his girl, therefore, he always becomes the target if there is any conversation related to late marriage, love experience, boy friends and etc....
My opinion to this uncle is...go out to see the world lah. He should not teach there over 10 years because he will never meet his girl in a jungle....come on...

Some more, working in a jungle is like working in a isolated place. You are not going to have chance to take new challenges or socialise with different people. Your mindset will stop at the place before you entered the jungle. Believe me, your brain will not grow if you refuse to take any pressure. His excuse of staying there more than 10 years is he could not take the pressure in the city and sick of the hypocrites in other industries.
Well, I think people should not say the 80's babies cannot handle pressure nowsadays, old generation people also cannot tahan. One word, weak!!
Anyway, I do learn a lot from his experiences.

I am still observing other teachers there, maybe I will have more stories to tell. Stay tuned^^

I post this picture because I think I am living a retired life now.

P/S: jogging and eating healthy food everyday, hope to see a pretty me soon.*-*

Teacher's life

Had been cooped up in the room for all day, searching for some useful information for my students. Huh! I really sacrificed a lot for my lovely students. Just rustle up some lunch then face the computer for more than 4 hours.

 After printed out all the exercises, felt a sense of accomplishment.But think ahead, that was the only thing that I can do for them. They are rather poor and living in a bad condition, at least for me, it is really bad. However, when you see the smile on their face, you would never think that actually they are poor people but wealthy people with overloaded love in their heart.

I think this will be the most memorable two months in my life, I will treasure it for sure. Working in the jungle is not a joke, some more with low pay at the begining. Maybe my Lord wants me to experience something very special with these angels. Experience with frogs, insects and unexpectable creatures.

A good news for myself is I don't need to spent the entire day just futzing around in my house but go out and have some contributions to some people.

发现~

Jane 叫我报告我的生活，所以我又回来了。
上次去了上海，本来有满肚子的感想想要分享的，但是现在又不想讲了。
女人嘛，就是善变。

前途茫茫啊。。。总觉得自己会一事无成。
爸爸最近讲了一些很难听的话，让我十分心痛。
但是我从来不会因为别人的话而觉得自己是个无用的人，就算是我爸爸也是一样。
我是一个有价值的人，起码在天父心中，我是如此地与众不同。

中庸。
我的人生应该可以用这个字来形容。
尽管我渴望着灿烂的烟火，但是我的生活就是起不了一点涟漪。
中庸的我。
中庸的成绩。
中庸的生活环境。
就连样貌也是中庸的。

分享一段文字吧！

“可不可以有一个人，可以看穿我的逞强，可以保护我的脆弱。他会在我的眼泪掉下以前，就用大大的手掌捂住我的眼睛，轻声说我的眼睛只有微笑的时候才是最好看。------ 他会在我受到委屈的时候把我的脑袋按在他的肩膀上，告诉我在他的面前永远都不需要伪装坚强，告诉我就算所有的人都不相信你你都还有我。”

看到这段文字，马上就有答案了。
“有！我慈爱的天父！”
当然，如果您把亚当送给我就最好啦~嘻嘻！！

读后感~

最近就是无聊，自从我的手提电脑不见之后，就一直提不起劲来。
现在总算平静下来了，谢谢我的朋友，你们是最棒的！！！！
我明白所有的东西都是上帝创造的，然后赐给我的。
你这个死小偷竟敢偷我的东西，我一定一定一定会在上帝面前煮重你的米，你死定了！！！

最近发现了一些明星的微博，看了一些文章，还不错的。
这段文字是在康永的微博看到的，觉得很有意思。
他说：

15岁觉得游泳难，放弃游泳，到18岁遇到一个你喜欢的人约你去游泳，你只好说“我不会耶”。18岁觉得英文难，放弃英文，28岁出现一个很棒但要会英文的工作，你只好说“我不会耶”。人生前期越嫌麻烦，越懒得学，后来就越可能错过让你动心的人和事，错过新风景。~ ~ ~《康永，给残酷社会的善意短信》

有一点感触，因为我似乎错过了很多。
比如，觉得钢琴很难，就不学了。长大之后才发现钢琴也是魅力加分的一种方法。
每每看到别人在弹钢琴，手指就会不知觉得舞动，羡慕极那些手指舞者。
我想这就是康永所说的新风景，一个我永远都进入不了的新风景。

还好我对英文还算有一点坚持，算对得起自己^^ 。
我还蛮希望语文能带我到更远更远的地方，期待更美好的未来~

Ciao~

Today I have deleted a person in my facebook.
What a relief!!
I am really proud of myself because I always do what I want to do and do I want I need to do.
I hate to care about your feeling and let my heart feel painful all these time.

I just don't like you.
Although you might be very smart and outstanding for other people,
in my world, you are not approved to stay.
Go out from my world and I hope you may rest in peace.

Yeah...........................

P/S: just want to record this day. Don't need to care much about this person, she is just a small chapter in my life.^^

Another Day

I am moldy.

I did nothing today.

My brain is dying.

I want to go back to campus.

Even you want me to sit in Mr. Paul's class.

There was no input for the past few days.

I don't want to have these kind of meaningless life anymore.

Surpringly, even cinema also could not attract me anymore.

Darn.....!!

Maybe I need a friend or a book.

Yea..... I need a friend.

Then, that means I have to go back loo.

P/S: Question to myself : why I don't have any friends in PJ??

       Answer to myself : Because this is the result of your bloody hell anti-social attitude.=(

If Love -- Khalil Fong

Lately, I fall in love with Khalil Fong's songs. One of my favourites is 'If Love' (如果爱)
The lyrics was written by Khalil and my idol Vivian Hsu. They are so talented in composing music and lyrics. I can say it loudly here to Vivian : "You are more than the dress and the voice!!!"
Sharing Time

* 如果爱没有那么烦  我不会吃不下晚饭
也不会多么的堕落 如果你说你爱我
如果爱可以很简单 我也不会有这么乱
整个世界在转          你或许可以说你爱我吗
地图有东南西北      爱情却不是绝对
跑很远 累不累   1+1不是2 虾米！ 无解的逻辑
我不问完美是什么 怀疑是什么
明天你是什么          不后悔

repeat*

黑夜有了你更美   让人自愿变傀儡
月憔悴  看不见 我要爬上一座天梯 摘星星给你
我不管完美是什么 唯一是什么
明天我是什么        无所谓

P/S: I wanted to translate it but somehow it has become very weird after I have translated some of the lyrics.
In general, it means if love is simple, then I don't need to think so much, I will love you no matter what happen^^

Sikit comments~

I feel so good today because God answered my prayer. I think I will have my smiling face day and night for the whole week. What I prayed for?? hehe...I want to keep it for myself. But there is a point here, God does answer prayers. ^^
Last week, my friends have some arguments and the situation is getting worse. Erm...what to say. Actually I have no rights to give any comments to their arguments because both of them have their reasonable reasons. Well, this is our growing proccess, I hope they do learn something from this. This happening keeps remind me the idiom--"Never judge a book by its cover". I learned this long long ago, I always keep this in mind. However, many people seem like never learn any lesson from this idiom because the 'covers' are well printed.
Yea. Talking about reflection, when you come out with many many excuses and reasons to defend yourself, have you ever thought of your misdeeds?? Maybe you need to take some responsiblity in this arguments. Or you actually knew everything but you refuse to admit it?? I don't know, only you know it. Maybe you are too busy to protect your perfect image in front of people, therefore you have no time for REFLECTION.

aiya....I should not be busy body and gave so many comments here....haha
But, you know..they are my friends, I did this for love.

P/S: God, I know the answer now but the answer gave me brokeness. Please mend my heart as soon as possible. Sometimes, Your answers give me tears and happiness together, so fan nao~

家中的日子

回家几天了，尽做些无聊事，但是还真是很快乐。
帮忙做了些家务，流了一身汗，感觉好像又复活了。
傍晚的时候，站在屋后吹着凉凉的风，好像小时候无忧无虑的我。
吃完晚饭，在厨房洗碗，还要和蚊子搏斗，真是讨厌这些不死生物。
遇见一位久违的同学，她的孩子已经四岁了，她看起来好像三十岁，
原来摧人的不只是岁月，还有生活。
和我的姐妹小聚一会儿，庆幸自己还有朋友。
每天晚上都看电视，发现我还是家中的电视王，哈哈=)

P/S: 虽然决定忘记他，但是还是舍不得，所以继续想念～

My father ^.^

今天爸妈来找我和姐姐吃饭，顺便把我的杂物搬回去。

吃完饭后，爸爸问我：“你等下要不要买水果？”
我把脸扳过去假装没听到，因为我是非常懒惰切水果的，所以一向都不买水果。
妈妈看到我的反应，就说: "她的字典里面没有这个字，所以你看她没有反应."
爸爸就说：“你平时没有吃水果的么？”
我说：“我在直凉的时候也没吃啊，除非你切给我吃。”
爸爸说：“你看你的皮肤不美了。”
我说：“你吃水果，但是你的皮肤也没我的美啊。”
哈哈哈哈哈。。。。


爸妈送我到家的时候，我想回刚才那一席话，突然惊觉没有爸爸照顾的我竟是如此地不会照顾自己的生活。
我以前的生活，无论从小事到大事，都是爸爸张罗的。
爸爸要烧菜，洗衣，折衣，买日常用品，电灯泡，水电费。。。。连我们的白凤丸他都要理。
我们整屋子的女人就像末代皇帝一样等爸爸来服侍我们，当然包括我妈妈。


爸爸, 临睡前我将你放入祷告, 希望你健健康康, 妈妈你也是。


我爱你们！！！

我变了~

现在是一点四十二分，听着陶子的‘我变了’。
我喜欢里面的一段词，
“我变了碰到你什么都对了，
爱上你下雨也快乐，
我变了碰到你什么都好了，
爱上你哭泣也值得”

发疯地爱上一个人就是这种感觉，
你并没有发现自己变了，
只是在时过境迁以后，
你才发现自己已经不再是自己了。

下雨也快乐，
哭泣也值得，
我还想加多一句，
‘思念也变得美丽’。

以前我不会三更半夜坐在这里想念一个人，
不会这么傻，
不会失眠，
不会让我的智商变零蛋，


原来，我变了~

Alice or Elyse???

If you know me, if you are my old old friend, maybe you would know my first English name.

Yup....bingo.....my name was Alice.
This name was suggested by my friend because she saw me always ran and ran around in school helping teachers to do a lot stuff. So, I was named Alice, just like the Alice in the wonderland.
I like this name though because I like the story and musics in 'Alice in the wonderland'(Disney version)
Recently, this movie was out in the cinema, I went to watch it.
The movie was good but I think it can still be improved.
Anyway.....
It reminded me a lot of things back to my primary school.

In the old days.....

We were naive, silly....sometimes we were very brave, smart and tough.
I miss my old schoolmates.....
At that time, I was too young, I forgot to say something that I would like you all to know for a long time
Thank you for loving me all these time
Without you guys, basically I am nothing
I still remember who is White Rabbit, Caterpillar, Cheshire Cat, Jabberwock, Mad Hatter and lastly The Queen of Heart.....haha

miss u guys

And I think it was my pleaasure for being your Alice in your wonderland before.
Now, my name is Elyse, I have left our 'wonderland'.....how about u??

人与寂寞

今天，我想什么都不管，坐在这里泡部落格。

刚才一个人去吃晚餐，因为朋友们都有各自的节目。

出门的时候下雨了，但是我死都要出去，不想因为一个人而放弃晚餐， 很有骨气吧！

我坐在那看见有几座的顾客也是一个人吃晚餐，但是却不停地在看手机。

心想：真的有那么忙么？还是他们想利用手机来掩饰一个人的寂寞。

有时候，人在遇到寂寞的时候，真的是会措手不及，也不懂得应付 ，只好在那边装忙咯。

哈哈，我以前也是这样，所以我明白。

一个朋友曾经说过，她不会一个人去吃饭，因为孤单只影，这样会引来路人同情的眼光。

我可不管叻，如果你同情心泛滥，请同情路边的狗， 我好得很 （听起来有一点伤感）哈哈

其实，人很多时候都是一个人啊，像搭巴士，购物，看书，洗澡。。。。

所以，人与寂寞是一场持久的拉锯战，只有学会和它相处，人生才不会显得悲哀。

P/S：今天的心情是紫色~

很想。。。。

很想出去犯贱，

很想做一只脱缰的野马，

很想再一次一个人去看电影，然后在戏院里不顾旁人的眼光劈哩哗啦地乱哭一场，

很想整个下午看完已经堆满灰尘的张爱玲，

很想去爬树，去体验一下猴子的心情写照，

很想骑马，让飞逝的风把我的烦恼带走，

很想带上帝去旅行，让我们一起体验地球的魅力，

很想泡澡，让水淹没我五分钟，想象我已身在天堂了，

很想飞到美国去见怡慧，让她知道我还是很爱她的，记得要坚强，

很想去听张学友演唱会，在人群中感受美妙音乐的感动

很想。。。。。。。。。

I need something~

I need energy, positive one. I find myself surrounded by negative aura.....I want to die ald, please leave me alone. If you guys have problems, please settle it yourself, don't throw it to me. My brain only has limited space for negative items, now it is overloaded ald.


I need water, clean one. In PJ, for God sake, the water is brown in colour. What happened to this country? No clean water at all. Do I really need to immigrant to Paris in order to get clean water??


I need movies, meaningful one. All my friends know I am a movie geek, movies is 90% of my life, I can't live without it. But....directors...please don't produce junk movies, what I want is just 'sincerity'. I can't feel your effort from your movies....hey people, stop cheating consumers!!! Cinema is a dream factory, it is not a recycle factory!!!

My 2010 Chinese New Year

Happy Chinese New Year!!! I know now is kind of late to say this, but I only can feel the atmosphere of Chinese New Year now. The first day of Chinese New Year in Triang was a disaster because the whole Bera was out of electric supply. I have been living here for 22 years, this is the first time TNB gave me 'special' CNY. They claimed that something exploded, therefore, they needed to transfer a very 'important' machine from Kuala Lumpur, and it needed to take 3 hours. But after 24 hours, they still haven't settled.
Anyway, all of this is over and I manage to survive.

I saw some of my friends. This time, I feel more reluctant to stay longer with them. Maybe because we don't have anything to say, no common topics, no common interests....nothing. Sometimes, I just miss them, but when I meet them....ok...I saw you already...you are perfectly fine...ok...see you next time, this kind of feeling. I hope I could rebond with them and create our own 'NEW' memory.

Yesterday, my dad suddenly wanted to have our very first family meeting with us. It sounded very serious for me as I thought he was going to announce something very important. Before the meeting.......very quiet....then he said we need to take care of each other..... when we work after graduate, we need to respect our supervisors...bla..bla...bla....and finally the most essential message: you both(my sister n I) can find a boyfriend...no matter who is he, he needs to love you with all his heart.........*endless lecture*
My body was electrocuted when I heard this....aiyo...baba..we need to hand this to FATE and DESTINY, this is not something we can control. Find a boyfriend?? where to find?? give me a clue,please!!! My sister said we already have our green card, we can do whatever we want now~

真相的另一面

当你想要表现得十分悲伤的时候，可以不可以拿出少少演技出来骗我，掩饰一下你嘴角的微笑。